When I left and didn't.

Do you remember that day when I was just so sad?
Away from you, in distress, clad,
I had thought about how I had to leave,
There was no choice, no reprieve.

The days had inched slowly closer,
And nothing was ever getting better,
It was time to leave time to go,
Time to move, time wouldn’t slow.

The calendar spoke of days, looming,
Nearer and nearer, I wasn’t’ blooming,
I wanted time to die, I wanted to stay,
Frozen here, for another day.

I had no choice, so I began to count,
The days left, I became more alarmed,
And as my distress slowly grew,
I thought I’d confide in you.


It was like that then, instantaneous,
Replies, whenever I always wanted,
I had felt so loved, so wanted,
My spirits, you so gently lifted.

It went wrong today, when I had said,
What happened love? You had responded.
And I could tell you everything,
That happened there and in-between.

It was never awkward, some things from you I kept,
It’s true, something’s I didn’t share,
But that was because I was self-obsessed,
I didn’t mean to hurt you; there were so many things, unsaid.

I wish I could have explained myself a lot better,
I wish it wasn’t this complicated, that things were nicer,
I know it’s a little too late to expect,
I have been so bad, and so many things have been wrecked.

But please forgive, please be my friend,
There should be no pain, make it grand,
Your return, please….my best friend,
Let it not be love or pain, let it be friendship, I pray.

2:52 pm, 9th January, 2010.